| Tuesday, May 13, 2008 |
| Just Being Honest |
For those of you that know me, you must admit that rarely, if ever, have you witnessed me feeling down. In fact, I tend to find the humor in almost everything. Don't get me wrong, I have moments just like everybody else, but this time it is a little different.
Yesterday (May 12, 2008) marked 60 days left to spend with my family before I go to Iraq. It seems that time is flying by and yet I know that when July 12th arrives - time will cease to move. I can't seem to hold my family enough, kiss my children enough, play with my children enough, and tell my wife that I love her enough. My children do not understand that in 59 days, I will leave and may not come back. It is a very scary and surreal time in my life.
I am actually having trouble sleeping at night. Every time that I lay down, my mind goes to that horrible place called Iraq. There is nothing that I can do to get out of going. The military still demands that I do all the "games" for the military. But the shocking thing is that it is totally irrelevant that I play the games well. In fact, I could refuse to play the games and I will still be deployed. All of this contributes to the depression that I am feeling.
The only good thing about this deployment is that it will be my last. Shortly after I get back, I will turn in my papers. That will bring so much joy. But until then I will have to continue to feeling this way – watching the clock fly by and realizing that this could be the last time that I am with my family...I'm just being honest!! |
posted by Capt. C @ 8:59 AM  |
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| 1 Comments: |
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As my eyes tear up, it is difficult to think of the right thing to say. The right words. The perfect words.
There are none. There are no perfect words for a terrible situation.
I have always known you as a person of conviction, courage and faith.
When you leave on July 12th, I hope that you leave knowing that all who care about you wish they could be by your side. I can't be there physically but know that I will be there with you mentally each and every day, with a quart of courage when you are running low, a bushel of faith to dip into as needed, and a bouquet of my prayers with enough petals to pull off one for each day that you are there to help you count the days tell you return safely home to those who love you most, your family.
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As my eyes tear up, it is difficult to think of the right thing to say. The right words. The perfect words.
There are none. There are no perfect words for a terrible situation.
I have always known you as a person of conviction, courage and faith.
When you leave on July 12th, I hope that you leave knowing that all who care about you wish they could be by your side. I can't be there physically but know that I will be there with you mentally each and every day, with a quart of courage when you are running low, a bushel of faith to dip into as needed, and a bouquet of my prayers with enough petals to pull off one for each day that you are there to help you count the days tell you return safely home to those who love you most, your family.